A year in review

Hey ladies,

I haven’t been on here in a while and I realize that I owe you a few posts. Here is one of them!

2011. What was it like?

Well, it started in a rather similar manner to this year if I recall correctly, with me feeling exceedingly under the weather. Then I had a rather disgusting throat infection which lead to me wear my largest and most comfortable track pants and sweater when all of you lovely ladies came over for a Lord of the Rings: Extended Edition marathon on January 1st. I loved that. I mean, honestly, LOTR (with all of its geeky amazingness and actor hotness) and three best friends who I am comfortable enough with to allow them to see me at my shitiest and those same friends being so lovely as to still come and see me when I was all disgusting and who were also equally enthused about the geekery and hotness. I’m not sure that life gets a whole lot better than that, even with the sickness in the equation, so the start of 2011 was definitely good.

Entirely too shortly after the awesomeness that was January 1^st I had to return to school city and go to school. January 2011, in general and excluding the first day, was rather a shit month. I was living with people who, over the course of that month, made their dislike for me painfully clear and dealing with a lot of stress concerning the possible solutions to this problem. I’m very much a person of solid roots; I like to find a place to be and stay there. Looking for a new place to live, with the added stress of the financial strain inherent in this solution and that of missing hours of work in order to search for this new place, almost drove me over the edge at points but I got through it and officially came to own my very own house for the first time in my life (far earlier in said life than I’d originally thought).

Funnily enough, I know I wrote the single longest post on the blog about moving into my new house sometime in early February but it seems to be missing... THE HELL?! Where did it go?!

February 2011 was a month of learning a lot. Learning things about shovelling gravel driveways, about paying bills, about furnaces and water softeners, about the places that spiders like to hide, about how to construct furniture, about how much can really fit in the back of a car, about installing blinds and towel racks and numerous other things, and about how it is possible for a steak to be so good you experience orgasmic bliss. Would I say that I’m an expert at any of these things now? Heck no, but I certainly know a lot more than I did and that’s something.

Now let’s try a harder sort of honesty. Although my surface life was looking pretty good at this point, the rest of that semester of school was not a good time for me. I experienced the most anxiety I’ve ever felt about school and it was terrifying at times. It was all I could do to sit through my classes some days and my exams were nightmares. I was feeling a lot of pressure to do well and experiencing a complete lack of faith that I was capable of it. My whole experience of those two months is very dark and frustrated by the fact that confiding any worries provoked a “You’ll do well because you’re you and you always do well” sort of response. Not the most comforting of words for someone who feels like they’ve turned inside out. What if I wasn’t that person anymore? What would happen if I couldn’t do it? What would happen if the constant of my great academic performance turned on its head like so many other ideas I’d had about my life up until that point? I didn’t know.

I’ve always had a rather large fear of failure. The attitude expressed to me by so many people I find admirable that it’s perfectly okay to fail at something because it can lead to you trying other things that are so much more successful is one that, no matter how are I try to adopt, I still haven’t managed to believe entirely. If I said that I still don’t experience some of the same feelings of anxiety from that last semester I’d be lying but I have come a bit farther into accepting that anything worth doing carries with it a risk defeat and that the risk, and even the experience of the consequence, is worth the chance at something great. I’m not very far along on that but I’m edging my way closer in my very cautious Slytherin manner.

There were certainly some high points that came in all of that drama, including seeing my very first a cappella concert at my school (which was absolutely fabulous), the extremely cool psychology of evil course, several Tuesday movies, the joy of an English class without reading, and C&D madness and giggles with Emily.

After the semester ended there was also some seriously good times. P-Prom year 2! I love it so much that our group of friends does this. We are classy b****es! Yes, we are. It’s so great that we can all get together and do something so awesome together. This is especially true when it’s full of moments like improper pretentious eyebrows when wine tasting, newly discovered theme songs and outrageous games of King’s Cup. I seem to remember being told I was a very good hand-holder at the end of that night, too, so I suppose that’s a good compliment to have as well.

Another experience that was uniquely 2011 was that of the end of Harry Potter. I think we’ve all already talked about that but it was amazing in so many ways. Seeing so many of my school friends also lined up in huge lines because we’re amazingly cool nerds made me beyond happy and sharing that moment with them and you ladies was phenomenal. Tears were shed, squees were squealed, happiness flowed. Reading from Beedle the Bard to put you ladies to sleep and then waking up to find our faces on the front page of the local paper... All was well on those days. :P

In August I was finally employed! Hurray! This decision lead to the decision to work through the coming semester of school which I had never done before. I think it worked out fairly well and by December I had made enough money to pay for my tuition for this semester. The lack of free weekends was definitely something I felt strongly towards the end of the semester but all in all, I think it worked out fairly well.

This past semester had some strange and wonderful moments. Mostly notably, I went on my first official date ever and it was everything I could dream it would be. There was also a notable double date which involved a lot of squeaking and rumbling laughter and hand-holding and fantastic music which was fantastic! :P

This past semester also had a lot of learning in it, much like February, because I had to negotiate a house without running water and a rather bizarre and exhausting experience of trying to change my internet access.

This semester ended with a load of happiness as I was allowed to go home for the holiday and spend some much needed relaxation time with my family and with you ladies (who I consider my extended family). My Christmas was fantastically nerdy. My sushi cravings were satisfied. My slash appetite well appeased by Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows which I saw with Dawn (I’m listening to the soundtrack now and loving it). I’m so glad I had the time to do all this and get some much needed sleep as this new year and new semester are looking like a lot of work already.

Here’s to a fantastic year passed and a fantastic year to come!

Much love ladies,

Dina

P.S. (This is one post I owed you. Look out for my Guilt-Free Three in the near future.)